Our Little M&M: The Story Behind Baby JET’S Red Onesie & Hope for Couples who Desire Children

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  I posted a photo last week of our miracle, Baby JET. In this image JET was featured wearing a red M&M onesie. Like many things surrounding Baby JET, this onesie  has a story behind it, and I’m not talking about a “melt in your mouth, not in your hand” kind of story either ; ).

Some know that my husband Jerrell and I have desired to bring home a baby for a few years now; yet instead we have brought home many tears and heartache due to a series of miscarriages.

The interesting part is that even on our doubtful (human) days our faith reassured us that we would have children.

As a matter of fact, I recall a recent conversation with my cousin Nikki (who always believed we would have children) that was very powerful.
Nikki knows, because we have shared, that even some of the most seemingly faithful to God people wavered in their ability to encourage us at times; I guess in fear of not wanting to “get our hopes up”.

Either way, during this conversation, Nikki shared the reason she continued to believe that we would have children. Nikki revealed that shortly after our first miscarriage, she asked if we would try to have children again and my response that we would try again as soon as the doctor provided us clearance confirmed it for Nikki. In other words, Nikki believed for us because of our faith!

Now back to the story behind Baby JET’s red onesie. You see I have owned this onesie for around two years now. It has been tacked onto vision boards and even hung on the arm of my chair in my prayer room. As a matter of fact, this onesie is sized for a 12 month old.

Why did I feature a photo of Baby JET in an oversized onesie? You may ask. Well, as some may recall, I was invited to perform a book reading and discussion of “God Please Clean My Room” in New York two years back. 

The day prior I was walking with my friend Kim, as we both were pregnant and wanted to maintain our health. Kim’s motivation was prompted by her doctor, while my motivation was to overcome my fear.

Though doctor’s reassured me  that my miscarriages had nothing to do with my engaging in any physical activity, somewhere in the back of my mind I blamed myself and avoided working out during pregnancy.

This time was going to be different! I was trusting in God to believe that this pregnancy would be successful & Kim, like many others who love Jerrell and I were believing too! So with my faith, I was leading Kim up the trail and striving to push her to match my pace as I was gaining my confidence.  Kim and I returned to our cars and agreed to meet up regularly to maintain healthy weights during our pregnancies.  So you can imagine my dismay when I began spotting once I returned home that evening.

I contacted my prayer partners, laid down for the remainder of the evening, and even had Jerrell pack our bags while I saved my energy for our flight the next morning.

I was terrified, but hopeful as I spotted off and on the morning of our flight. I even fought to hold on to my faith as my stomach cramps intensified during the flight, but once we landed and I was “in the clear” I believed my baby was safe in my womb.

I became so confident that when our friend Anthony greeted us upon arrival at Felicia’s apartment, we shared the good news that we were expecting! The joy we felt was short-lived as my first visit to the restroom resulted into an all too familiar bloody stool.

I then, asked for Jerrell to travel to the nearest store to pick up some pads (AKA sanitary napkins).  Anthony accompanied Jerrell for support; meanwhile I remained in the restroom crying & praying.

As God would have it, Felicia’s apartment was walking distance from the hospital. Anthony was kind enough to leave us with his iPad for assistance, as he had to report to work.  Jerrell and I having done this before decided to skip the ER and asked if an OB/GYN would squeeze us in instead; while they accepted us, we still remained at the hospital our entire first day in NY.

The ultrasound tech, insulted us with the “are you sure you are/were pregnant” question prior to the doctor’s ordering a blood test to confirm our pregnancy.  This was followed by an apology as the doctor confirmed our miscarriage.

It was absolutely terrible sitting in a waiting room full of pregnant bellies, as I knew I was losing yet another child. It was also painful walking by baby bumps on the street once we left the hospital.  It felt downright cruel to contact my home OB/GYN to cancel my upcoming ultrasound and checkup. At times, it felt like more than we could bear, and we did not feel equipped to engage in the spiritual warfare that was surrounding us, but it was clear that God was there.

Where? You may ask. God was present in our decision to acknowledge our pain, yet rest in the support of loving friends such as Felicia and Anthony, as well as, Kendra who purchased a bus ticket from NJ the day of because she knew we were hurting.

God was there in our decision to press through and perform one of the best “God Please Clean My Room” reading & discussion sessions I’ve ever done! For it was following this session that my dear friend Felicia looked into my eyes & said, “you were born to do this and you are definitely in your element”. Anthony reiterated this as well in that moment.

God was in our decision to sight-see, try to make the best of our trip, & tour M&M World.  For while in M&M world we took pictures in a photobooth and purchased a few items. One of which was the red M&M onesie that Baby JET was featured wearing above.  We purposely purchased the 12 month size, as a declaration of our faith that God would eventually bless us with a child that would not only be born, but one that would grow and develop heathily!

Thank you for reading our story. It is our prayer that it will be of encouragement to those who have endured similar trials.

Hang in there. Don’t give up.
Don’t give in & know that God has not forgot!

Below I have featured images from that NY trip. May they remind us all to never judge a book by its cover.

God Bless You!

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Keeping up with VALENCYA updates ; ) 

1) Purchase my Children’s Book via link below image:

Book Cover

http://bookstore.xlibris.com/Products/SKU-0105968017/God-Please-Clean-My-Room.aspx

2) Download my song, God Please Clean My Room (from your favorite player, but itunes link is below):

https://itunes.apple.com/us/album/god-please-clean-my-room-feat./id591875935

 

3) Book Me for Preaching, Speaking, & Workshops to all ages and populations via info@ValencyaThompson.com  – I cover an array of topics, some of my most frequent include:

Preaching Gospel icon

 

Girls and Women Empowerment Icon

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Fertility Hope Icon

 

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Real Love

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I am so in love right now!

I cannot tell you by simply using words how many different thoughts about parenthood, childhood, and the great expectations I have about my son’s arrival.

I am currently 31 weeks 1 day (approaching 2 days) pregnant & I am absolutely ecstatic. Some of you know my story and others may be new to my writings. Either way, I am 4 years, 3 months married and my spouse and I have been a couple for 8 years. Geesh that sounds like a lot of time to me being in my early 30s. My spouse and I have experienced 3 confirmed miscarriages, though I believe there were more, and needless to say, the road to parenthood  has been difficult and sad for us.

Well in the midst of all of the love  I have been feeling, I have been doing a lot of reflection, and I have come to the realization that the painful parts of my journey have caused me to receive God’s love and appreciate God’s blessings even more!

I now realize with the life that I feel growing and moving inside of me that my priorities have completely shifted, it’s like nothing else even matters at all.  Allow me to be clear, individuals who know me understand that historically I am a very ambitious woman with many goals, and I typically have no problem with pursuing more than one project at once.

Yet something is quite different this time. It is as though I have tunnel vision and laser focus about the life of this child God has blessed me with and all other former priorities will have to “get in where they fit in”.

I remember my younger years and the plans that I had for myself, even back in high school. My plan was to attend a four year university, be married by 22 upon graduation, have my first child by 25, and you get the picture.

I don’t even know where those arbitrary timelines came from, I guess somewhere in my young teenage mind they sounded nice.

I didn’t stop there with the goals though, once I was actually married at 27 years old, my husband and I set a goal to have children by 3 years in.  This meant somewhere around year 2 we would begin trying. Because we were on birth control, I heard somewhere that it may take a while before we would find success once we came off it. You can only imagine the shock I felt when I experienced my first pregnancy shortly after! Truth be told, I can recall sitting on my living room couch in utter terror thinking something like, “we’re pregnant…what now?”

In other words, somewhere in my gut I felt we weren’t ready & I know as embarrassing as it is to say, I wasn’t ready to love as hard as I am now. I just desired to have a baby because it sounded like something married people were “supposed” to get started on by that point in marriage & besides “I wasn’t getting any younger.”

I mean who makes this stuff up anyways? We humans can truly be a piece of work on ourselves at times. Thank God for mercy and grace.

Would you know me, formerly “Ms. Socialite” & “be all to any and everybody” now finds her greatest joy being at home with her husband and dog, all while holding onto her belly with visions of her baby?

God is completely awesome! What is my point? Even this blessed pregnancy that shall result in victory has contained trials of its own, yet I am able to count it all joy simply because of God’s majestic design.

There is really much truth in the saying that “rainy days allow us to appreciate God’s sunshine”. Lord knows I am a “living testimony”.  Furthermore, things that I thought were simplistic in nature before have now become the things I value most in life.

And that my friends is my definition of REAL love.

Your take away: before you run off to pursue your laundry list of plans, ask yourself, “why is this important by this time?” “did I check with God?” “what will I gain or lose?” “Can this wait?”

God Bless.